My Mission Statement

Day Thirteen:

I have reviewed the twelve days of writing and copied passages into Word.  It seems that Financial Independence is a key as is acceptance.  Doesn't every writer want to be accepted?  Acceptance struck a chord and I looked up page 449 in the AA Bigbook:

For me, serenity began when I learned to distinguish between those things that I could change and those I could not. When I admitted that there were people, places, things, and situations over which I was totally powerless, those things began to lose their power over me. I learned that everyone has the right to make their own mistakes, and learn from them, without my interference, judgement, or assistance!

The key to my serenity is acceptance. But "acceptance" does not mean that I have to like it, condone it, or even ignore it. What it does mean is I am powerless to do anything about it... and I have to accept that fact.

I spent years trying to change things in my life over which I was powerless, but did not know it. I threatened, scolded, manipulated, coerced, pleaded, begged, pouted, bribed and generally tried everything I could to make the situation better -- only watch as things always got progressively worse.

I think initially I wanted to convince, change people's minds, but acceptance makes clear that I'm powerless over the opinions of others.  If that was my goal initially, it could get pretty frustrating.  Better to write for the joy of writing and let the writing find its readers, readers who will build a community.


The goal of Dave Trottier's Book 1 is to come up with a mission statement that is a reflection of my vision and passion.  So here it is:

I write to experience the joy of writing and connect with my readers. I get paid handsomely for my efforts.  I write stories that will entertain and influence my readers in an ethical way. I am a persistent writer who has learned that procrastination has few rewards.

Me As A Writer

Day Twelve:

Five Adjectives that describe me as a writer:
Curious
Observant
Reflects the common man
Political
Thoughtful
Tenacious
Loves words

Five Adjectives that describe my writing:
Clever
Humorous
Questioning
Poetic
Moral  - basic values

Next: My creative vision

Attitudes And Values.

Day Eleven

The following statements are my attitudes and values concerning writing:

• I like to express my feelings and ideas.  I enjoy the creative feeling.
• I like to empower people with useful information.
• I like to persuade people to take some action or to think differently.
• I like to inspire people.
• I Like to entertain people.
• I like to help people to develop their abilities.
• I love words and enjoy crafting readable sentences and paragraphs.
• I like to tell stories.
• I like seeing my name in print.
• Writing should communicate some kind of message.
• Writing feeds off and explains the culture war.
• Writing forces me to know myself better.

If I prioritize  the list it would look like this:

1. I like to express my feelings and ideas.  I enjoy the creative feeling.
2. I like seeing my name in print.
3. I love words and enjoy crafting readable sentences and paragraphs
4. I like to tell stories.
5. I Like to entertain people and know myself better.
6. I like to empower people with useful information.
7. I like to persuade people to take some action or to think differently.
8. I feel compelled to write about what is happening in our culture.

Most people like to write what they read.  Here's what I read:

• Tom Clancy types- an insight into current political thinking
• Fiction - I enjoy the creativity and the well written sentences and character studies
• Non-fiction - some insight into science, government economic policies, stock market and investing
• Crime novels - I love the intricate plots of the whodunnit
• Sci Fi - if it is not too weird.  I like stuff that is a glimpse into the future or poses a new paradigm
• Stephen King types - I love his conversations
• Some poetry because it requires one to strip out the excess

Next: Describe me the writer.

Inventory

Day Seven:

What was the most creative period in my life?

This is the most creative period in my life.  It started 19 years ago when I living by myself without much furniture in my apartment.  I was nearing three years sober and fell crazy in lust with a blonde.  I would come home from an AA meeting, where I would see her, and sit down at my table and write poems.  I was amazed at what came out of the end of my pen and was moved to see the reaction my poems would have on those who read my poems.  Tears would flow and it saw how powerful were the words I strung together.

I went to Open Mikes and read my poems.  Many didn't rate more than polite applause, except for one night I heard, "Now that's a poem!"  I later met and married Beverly and continued my writing even taking classes from local poet and jazz musician Doug Marx.  Those weekly immersions in poetry fed the fires.  I started blogging in 2004 and that has taken over for poetry.  I seldom write poems anymore, but continue to view the world through a poets eye.

What was the most productive period in my life?

 One of the most productive periods happened when I was a stockbroker.  There was a new local bank going public and my firm was handling the underwriting.  For weeks I phoned people encouraging them to buy stock in the offering.  I talked to 200 people a day for two weeks.  In  the end I opened over 47 accounts, had the president and officers of the bank as clients and the offering was a huge success.  Later the bank was taken over by another bank for a 200% profit to the shareholders.

When was I so involved with something that I lost track of time?

I can lose myself when I'm writing poetry or when blogging and the words just flow.  I don't get hungry, tired or thirsty in that time.  Then something magical happens and I look at what I've written and wonder where that come from.

What was the greatest inner battle?

The decision to quit smoking led to my greatest inner battle.  My craving for nicotine took over my life.  I started in college at 18 and continued on until I was 47.  I tried to quit many times, with hypnosis, with aversion therapy and with the Seventh Day Adventists Quit program.  I always failed.  Finally, I read about a seer or sensitive who could talk with those who'd passed over.  The spirit said those who had the most trouble on his side were smokers.  They still had the habit and desire, but no way to satisfy the hunger for nicotine. Again I took the Seventh Day Adventists Quit program and my last cigarette was on November 10th, 1991.  A week later, I was going crazy looking for a cigarette through co-workers desks on a Saturday.  I called a friend of mine for help.  She asked me why I wanted to quit, so I started telling her and the compulsion was lifted.  I haven't had a cigarette for 19 years.

What did I learn?  I learned to approach things "one day at a time."  To break big boulder like problems into pebbles and attack each pebble.  I learned persistence.  I learned that I couldn't quit smoking alone.  That I needed a higher power to help me.

What accomplishment am I most proud?   

I am most proud of being sober for 22 years.  Alcohol was ruining my life.  I wasn't proud of who I was or how I acted.  I had severely embarrassed myself and my friends with my drinking.  I've said I was morally and financially bankrupt when I quit on June 23, 1988.  Since then, I have found the love of my life, have regained the love of my children and have a higher power in my life.  No longer do I feel a big hole in my insides.  I am proud of the way I act and treat people.

Tomorrow - What was my bravest moment?  What was my weakest moment?

Who Be You?

Day Six:

The journey is getting harder the next few exercises will concentrate on "who be you?"  They are designed to reveal my values, my highest ideals. the principles and beliefs most important to me, that bring me personal fulfillment or make me happy.

First, what does the world need?  The world needs to follow some basic principles:

• Love God for everything.
• We are all one.  When something happens to one of us, it happens to us all.  Therefore love everyone as you would want them to love you.
• Do all you agreed to.
• Do not encroach on another person or their property.
• Live each day as if it's the last day we'll ever have

Second, what are my top ten values in no particular order:

1. financial independence
2. knowledge, wisdom
3. acceptance
4. education
5. recognition
6. Joy
7. health
8. friendship
9. serenity
10. my wife's love
11. sobriety

Next, a look into the past at my most creative experiences.

My Legacy Exercise

Day Four:

Today, in the writing project, imagine what people will say at your funeral; how do you want to be remembered;  who do you want to remember you; what will be your greatest accomplishments?  Dave Trottier of "The Freelance Writer's Bible" suggest the exercise be done as freewriting for 10-15 minutes.

The older I get, I'm soon to be 67, the more I wonder how I want my funeral conducted, what music should play, do I want burial or cremation?  I've been to funerals laterly for friends and neighbors and I'm always amazed at how good the deceased was.  Pure, altruistic, loving, perfect father and husband, yada, yada.  I can never live up to all that sugar.  I weant to be cremated and my ashes scattered in the warm spots of Mexico,  What will people say?  He saw things in black and white, no gray.  Onece he decided on something he would defend the idea vigorously, BUT he would listen to your side, however he would not put up with faulty pemises or reasoning.  he was a conscious conservative in economics and liberal in social policies.  He didn't care if you were gay or straight, black or white.  He couldn't staND LIBERAL ECONOMIC POLICIES AND WHEN OVER WHELMED WITH SUCH NONSENSE WOULD FORCEFULLY SAY, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE, MORE THAN ONCE.

He WANTS TO BE REMEMBERED AS SOBER ON THE DAY HE DIED, A CHRISTIAN, BELIEVING (IN) A HIGHER POWER HE CALLED GOD.  hE BELIEVED THAT WE ARE ALL CONNECTED, BELIEVED IN REINCARNATIUON AND LOVED BEAUTIFUL WOMEN AND WAS CLEARLY CRAZY ABOUT BEVERLY.

dESPITE ALL HIS FLAWS, HE WAS VERY PROUD OF HIS TWO DAY\UGHTERS gILYN AND eRICA, LOVED HIS DOG, WAS A SENTIMENTAL GUY AND BELIEVED NO ONE EVER LOVED HIM LIKE bEVERLY

wHAT DID HE ACCOMPLISH? hE HELPED SECURE HIS FAMILY'S FINANCIAL(FUTURE) BY BUYING GOLD AND SILVER, hE WAS A PUBLISHED WRITER AND pOET, pOTTER, INLINE SKATER, AND GOLFED IN THE 80S.  rEALLY DON'T THINK I'VE ACCOPLISHED MUCH.  pROBABLY FEEL A LITTLE TRAPPED IN THIS pORTLAND LIFE and want to travel and Live where it's warm  Would like to help kids on the bus to be better drivers using the Smith system.

Michael loved to tell stories appropriate to the occasion, many off color loved to laugh and loved to needle those he loved.  He was curious and an avid reader, Loved a good debate. cOULD SING LIKE ELVIS.

Right now I'm not sure what that accomplished.  I have edited the above freewriting for typos to make the writing understandable.  What does come out is that I have doubts about how I will be remembered and doubts about what I have accomplished in 66 years.

Tomorrow's exercise: a letter to a child.

Freewriting

Day Three:



David Trottier writes in "The Freelance Writer's Bible" that freewriting is a method of writing without restraints that allows our subconscious to push information into our consciousness.  On pages 64-65 writing about generating ideas he tells us about freewriting:

You simply remain open with no expectation.Write whatever comes into your head., no matter how off-the-wall.  Keep writing for ten minute.  Just let whatever is inside you gush out.  Do not evaluate it or correct the spelling as you go.

 So here goes.  I'm freewriting ANND THINKING ABOUT THE MOVIE i SAW WITH MY WIFE ON sATURDAY NIGHT AFTER THE oREGON sTATE F\GAME THAT WAS SUCH A BLOWOUT BY sTANFORD.  #8 04 48 TO NOTHING.  f|dOES IT MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE WHAT THE SV\CORE WAS . iT WAS A LOSS NOW INORDER TO BECOME bOWL ELIGIBLE THEY MUST BEAT oREGON IN THE cIVIL wAR.  lIKE THAT'S GOING TOP HAPPEN!  cvRAIG AND cAROL O\PICKED US UP AND WE DROVE TO THE hOLLYWOODTHEATER .  i MENTIONED THAT WHERE WE PARKED WAS WHERE OUR FAmily lived when I was in 5th grade.  I went to Laurel \hurst that one year.  Our landlord lived across the street and one day dad was asked to help her move some furniture.  Under her bed were packages the size of bundles of money .  Dad didn;t look inside but he was sure bothered for the rest of his days that he didn't.  The moviw we saw was Tmara Drewe'  It concerned a writers colony in England where sic\x aetists went each seasi\=on to be in the compoany of this very successful wwriter.  He had published a series of fictional novels.  In the movie was a real looker, her real name is Gemma Aterton,  One i\of the first scenes is Gemma or Tamara climbing io\over a fence in cutoff denim shorts and s\\as she wak\=lks toward our group of writers we see that her very lovely cheeks are hanging down below the shrts.,  Coiurtbey Cox stoler my libido when she appeared in a movie driving a fork lift and saod "Watch our\\t I might Fork you,"  Then thet\re was Michele Pfieffer, who ne3ver returned my phomne calls.  Well anyone who \would matrry David arquette or not return my phome calls needs to be dropped in favor of Gemma.  Great movie, an indie, hasn;t made much at the boxoffice.

---

Gad!  I can't type worth s--t!  My mind was racing while I was typing and I didn't look back to correct my spelling or punctuation or to uncap the CAPS.

I think this is a great idea and will help me with a story I was trying to write.  I was trying to imagine why my character would do the things he did.  The story is based on a real life situation.  I think if I freewrite on the subject, get out of my logical brain into my right brain, I could come up with reasons for his actions.

Tomorrow I write about "my legacy."

Do you have any stories about freewriting?  Would you share them with us?